And Another Thing…

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Rambling between apathy and antipathy

I am within spitting distance of this semester’s end. No more Dr. Sunshine. No more getting up at 2:30 in the afternoon to make my 4 o’clock class after working until 8:30 that same morning (and then going back into work for another 10 hour shift). No more going 36 hours without seeing Christine.  Two more papers stand between me and the home stretch for this degree. And for the life of me I cannot push myself to finish them.

I don’t really know why this inertia has settled on me, although I have some guesses. Part of it may be knowing that I have to take a summer elective that will start about two weeks after the spring semester ends.

Part of it may be knowing that next year I will have to do my final internship. This will entail 21 hours a week (location to be determined; when I know, you will know).  “But wait,” the observant reader interjects, “don’t you have to work?” Why yes, I do. How will I accomplish this? By working every Friday and Saturday night as well as two nights during the regular week. With the exception of the occasional holiday, I will either be at my paying gig or my internship. I am looking down the wrong end of a school year without a day off.

Part of it may be that due to our current non/maybe recession, I may graduate next year into…the same job I have right now. It’s a sweet gig for a student, but I have already had enough and I want out; no more night shift and preferably, no more shift work at all.

Part of it may be that my brother-in-law Steve sent me the artist line-up for this year’s Austin City Limits Music Festival and it looks fantastic. Of course, it’s in September; right after I start my internship.

I shouldn’t whine, I know. Many people who would love to attend graduate school never get the chance to do so. My wife has never, ever complained about the sacrifices she has had to make, first dating and then being married to a student. Although I am not crazy about my job, I was lucky to get it when I did for a number of reasons.

But I wish sometimes that I had all of this behind me. I wish that I had not sunk 10 years into the wrong line of work (for me) when I was younger.  I fear that I am teetering on the edge of burnout.  Any suggestions for coping would be welcome at this point.

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5 Responses

  1. preacherman says:

    You are lucky.
    There are so many in America that don’t have jobs or money.
    It is Friday!!!!!!!!!!
    I hope you have a great weekend!!!!!!
    Kinney Mabry

  2. Jill Young says:

    Hi Mike,

    Ditto what Kinney said above. I sure wish we were in a different place right now too, with Sam’s job and all! 🙂

  3. Kelly says:

    Odge, no secrets for coping here. Just know all of us our proud of you! And don’t regret those 10 years, you wouldn’t be the person you are now without them. Hang in there bro.

  4. preacherman says:

    Did you see the Indeana Jone’s teaser’s last night?
    It looked soooo cool!
    I can’t wait.

  5. Jerri Harrington says:

    Hey, Mike,
    Burnout is a real deal. I’ve had it many times in my adult life, and I think a few times in high school and college. Sometimes all you really need is a weekend. I also think there are several kinds of burn out–I’m in a burn out right now from being disappointed in the outcome of something in which I put years of effort. I have done several things this time, since I realiize that I’m in danger of real burn out. I’ve been making sure I do my daily Bible study and prayer–which sounds like a pat answer, but I don’t think I’d be breathing right now without it. I have been going to bed ontime and getting up ontime. I’ve been keeping up with my calorie/exercise journal with a few glitches here and there, and I’m taking time to relax with Don every evening and being nurturing to him. I’m also reading both books dealing with the problem we are dealing with, and trying to read for recreation. TV does not help me….I sit and stew while my mind goes numb. That really doesn’t help. Neither do movies, at least not Nim’s Island. It was fun…but didn’t engage my mind. Artwork helps…music helps, especially the praise and worship music on 91.9. I didn’t come up with all of this on my own. An old friend and minister told me once that when you go through a crisis, daily discipline really helps, because you feel more like yourself if you have a daily routine. Also, having my grandson with me everyday helps, because he is such a joy. So think of what gives you joy, and whenever you have a few minutes, indulge in that. I admire you! I wish I had my master’s degree! You didn’t waste your 10 years–think of what you learned about yourself. You’re a young guy, anyway! Good luck and get busy! :)Jerri (Can you tell I’m a mom of grown sons?)

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